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Chapter Nine
Broken Glass and Promises
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It was so…. Clean. Kalevi looked around, tail twitching. It couldn’t be more opposite to his own shithole house.
Kalevi hadn’t exactly had many friends at school. Kids were assholes. They picked on the scrawny, fat, sick, or weak. When he turned up to high school with a black eye and holes in his clothes, the other boys thought he was an easy target. Bad fucking luck for them. His teachers had sent him home with a note for his parents after he head-butted a kid hard enough to break the boy’s nose. Maybe the kid should have kept his mouth shut. Everyone quickly learnt that Kalevi was not the friendly type.
He was the weird kid, skinny and mean-looking. Girls ran the other way and boys threw shit at him when the teacher wasn’t looking. As such, Kal didn’t have many ‘playdates.’ He had taken Eli around the streets on Halloween though. That was the one time of year when a crappy ghost costume from a sheet could net him a kind smile and bucket of chocolates.
Even for Kalevi’s shrivelled old heart, he had enjoyed Halloween. It also meant a night away from his drunk father and cowering mother. Kal had made a point of taking Eli to the really good suburbs, even if it meant using his pitiful money to catch the bus. The better the houses, the better the candy. So long as they stayed with the crowd, they didn’t get picked on much. By the time Kal was sixteen, he had such a nasty reputation that most of the normal dipshits knew better than to cross his path. Some of Kal’s best memories were of sitting the park, late at night with his brother, sharing all their candy and laughing.
The only downside to these memories had been seeing those houses. Kal could remember peering into the hallways of hundreds upon hundreds of houses. He remembered the scent that wafted from them and what he always noticed was that the scent of rancid vomit and alcohol was lacking from each. White picket fences, clean lines, tiles, or sometime wooden floorboards. A front porch light that turned on, little glittery bats in the windows as decoration. All of these things were probably normal for most people but for Kal, they were alien and they were unachievable.
He’d felt embarrassment when he was as young as seven. He was embarrassed by the place he lived in. He never wanted anyone to see it. He hated that Eli was forced to see inside these luxurious homes and then return to their own were so much was wrong, rotten, or gone. What was Eli doing now?
‘We can set you up in here,’ Ben said happily as he closed the front door. Kalevi had been standing there, lost in his own thoughts. He blinked, gave himself a little shake and a feline stretch. He needed to clear his head and concentrate on getting back onto two legs. He padded after Ben’s long stride, peering about. There were quite a few bookcases. Odd little knickknacks were interspersed between the books, but there was a distinct lack of dust. The whole place seemed very clean. Honestly, who had spare time to dust?
‘Here we are. I’ll put your things here on the table. If you’re tired, you can sleep a bit. I know cats require more hours than most species.’ Kalevi blinked. They did? He was always tired, but he also worked like…. a lot, so he just assumed the low-key exhaustion was the result of that. The couch Ben had indicated to did look very comfy. It even had two sets of matching pillows! Fancy bastards.
The black cat sniffed at the fabric. It smelt of Vano’s aftershave as well as Ben’s own soft scent. The two men must live here together. Kalevi considered this for a moment. He couldn’t imagine them in a passionate relationship. Maybe they had been together for a long time and now they just had that sort of easy, comfortable space. That was a thing healthy couples could have, wasn’t it?
He jumped up on the couch. He resisted the urge to claw at it. He was an ass, but he wasn’t that much of an ass. He did tug a pillow until it flattened out. It was fluffy and big enough for him to climb on top of. He kneaded at it happily for a few minutes. He didn’t mean to fall asleep, but after a few minutes of wiggling about, he got comfortable and then he was out like a light.
A warm hand rubbed over his back. His eyes flew open, and he slashed wildly at his attacker, toppling off his pillow throne.
‘Easy. My apologies. I did not mean to startle,’ rumbled Vano. The man had good reflexes, his hand looking remarkably unscathed. Kalevi stared up at him moodily. Was the man trying to give him a heart attack!? Kal glanced towards the window. He must have been asleep for a couple of hours. He hadn’t even heard Vano walk in. Speaking of which… His little muzzle twitched in amusement. Vano was wearing his uniform. Or rather, he must have been wearing a spare uniform. It didn’t quite fit the stag’s massive shoulders. He looked as though he only had to flex, and the shirt would rip off him.
‘The man at the fishmonger is unpleasant,’ Vano said in his slow voice. ‘I need to wash.’
He left, leaving behind a rather pungent smell of old fish. As Kal’s fur lay flat again, he found himself amazed. Vano had actually worked a shift for him just so he wouldn’t lose his job. That was… no one had ever done anything like that for him before. He heard the shower going and found himself jumping down from the couch. He spent a few minutes grooming himself but soon found he was bored. His ears twitched, listening to the rush of pouring water.
Without thinking much about it, he started to explore, heading towards the bathroom. Every room seemed built for a giant. That perspective was not hard when he was so small. The water turned off just as he nosed open the door. Curiosity killed the cat, but surely it wouldn’t hurt just to take a peek…
Wow.
Yeah, that man was built big everywhere…
‘Kal?’ Ben called. Kalevi whipped back behind the door, fur floofing. Even out of sight, he very well remembered the glimpse of huge muscles and huge… other things. Damn. Was Kal really that thirsty? Mind, when was the last time he’d had a good, hard fuck, or even just shitty sex from a one-night hook up? The answer depressed him.
‘Now that you’re awake, how about we have a chat?’ Ben asked, finding the black cat slinking back into the living room. Kalevi wanted to roll his eyes. He really didn’t want another long discussion about his mental state and job status. Honestly, he was just tired of the lot of it.
‘The most common causes for an unwanted shift are exhaustion, sickness and stress. A troubled pregnancy can also cause inconsistent shifting, but I don’t think we need to worry about that,’ Ben said with a small smile. Kai huffed.
‘As for the other markers, you undoubtedly have two of the three,’ Ben said firmly. The cat’s tail flicked. ‘Those aren’t the only factors, but they are the most prevalent ones. Another contributor can be restricting your animal from having the freedom it needs. I understand in a city setting, this can be very difficult, but as a cat you actually have an advantage there. Nobody finds a cat an odd spectacle in an urban settling. A jaguar… is a bit of a different story.’
Kalevi shifted uneasily. If he was this much of a mess, he was worried about Eli. It was bad enough that he was stuck as a cat, but Ben was right. No one would look twice at a random cat in an alleyway but an adult jaguar… Yeah. That would cause some problems. Wild animals got shot far more often than they got tranquilised. Even a stray cow on the wrong highway was more likely to take a bullet to the head than to be roped and put safely back on a truck. That was just the world they lived in. Shoot first, don’t even bother asking questions later.
‘It’s okay Kal. Eli is safe. He’s at the library now with Kate studying.’ The black cat had started to fluff out again. Ben could hear the little animal’s hard breathing. Kal was definitely stressing about his brother. At his words, Kal looked up. His fur didn’t go flat, but he looked a bit calmer. ‘When you shift back and if you feel up to it, we can give him a call. For now, we need to worry about you.’ Kal wanted to roll his eyes. It was all very well and good to ask him to calm down, but he didn’t know how to do that. Suddenly, the floor seemed very far away.
The tiny black cat yowled in displeasure as Vano scooped him up. Ben’s lips twitched. He had a strong feeling that if he had been the one to pick up the feline, he would likely have been scratched to hell and back. Vano had that effect on even the prickliest of people. The black cat wiggled and grumbled energetically, but his little murder mittens stayed in the waiting position. Vano sat on the couch and placed the cat on his lap. Kal squinted accusingly up at him, tail flicking in annoyance.
‘We are going to try some meditation.’
Kal’s whole body twitched. Meditation? Seriously?
‘Don’t look at me like that, Kalevi. Just give it a chance. Please.’ The softness of Ben’s tone was disarming. Kal wiggled a bit until he got comfortable. Vano was radiating heat. It was… nice.
He’d heard of meditation, had even been advised to try it. He did. Once. Didn’t do shit for him. That and he didn’t have time to sit in silence.
‘Try to concentrate on the here and now.’ Jesus, here we go… ‘Think about how you feel, if you’re warm or cold. What is touching you, what you can hear and smell?’ Kalevi shut his eyes, more so he didn’t have to look at Ben’s dumb face than anything else. Seriously, meditation was such a waste of time. He had work tomorrow! The water bill was due soon. He couldn’t let it lapse again. What was Eli doing right now? Did he even-
‘Kalevi.’ Vano’s deep voice made his ears twitch. a massive warm hand, gently stroking down his back, smoothing the frazzled fur. Kal hadn’t even realized he’d been digging his claws into the man’s legs. Vano didn’t try to pry him off, just gently stroked down his back again. Kal had never let anyone besides Eli pet him before.
‘Try not to think about tomorrow or yesterday. Just be here.’ Slowly, very slowly, Kal’s muscles began to unknit. He couldn’t say this was working perfectly. As soon as his mind went quiet, a nasty thought about work, bills or his brother would creep back in, but then Vano would slowly run down his back and the thoughts would be temporarily chased away again. He wasn’t sure how long they sat there for. It could have been ten minutes or an hour. When he opened his eyes again, the light in the room seemed to have faded as the sun moved behind the city buildings.
‘Are you ready to try shifting?’ Ben asked. Kalevi reluctantly climbed down from Vano’s lap. He stretched, feeling his muscles and joints shifting. It had been a long time since he had felt like this. Not hungry, not thirsty, and not tired. He sat. He closed his eyes and tried to draw back the cat. This time, it responded.
‘Well done,’ Vano rumbled. Kalevi let out a loud, shaky breath of relief when he opened his eyes and looked down to see human hands and feet. Ah, yes. He was also naked.
‘I’ll go grab your things,’ Ben said. Kal couldn’t help but grin at the faint pink tinting the man’s cheeks.
‘What, never seen a dick before?’ he teased.
‘Don’t be crass, dear,’ Ben called as he went to get Kal’s bag. Kalevi frowned. He’d never been called dear before. As soon as he was dressed, Kal pulled out his phone, but hesitated. He had to call his brother. He stared blankly at the screen.
‘Would you like me to speak first?’ Ben asked gently. Kal nodded mutely. He dialled the number and put it on speaker. He half expected for the call to go straight through to voicemail. It didn’t.
‘Hello?’
‘Eli? This is Ben Fletcher speaking,’ Ben said in his polite voice.
‘Hi,’ came a hesitant reply. ‘You’re one of the shifters that is looking after Kal, right?’
‘That’s right,’ Ben replied calmly.
Kal’s heart lurched. ‘Is Kal with you?’
Ben met Kalevi’s eyes. ‘Yes, he is.’ Right. Kal was supposed to be saying something. He cleared his throat.
‘Hey bud,’ Kal forced himself to say. Shit, his voice sounded rough. ‘How’s it going?’
‘I’m sorry,’ Eli mumbled.
Kal frowned at the phone. ‘Huh?’
‘For what I said. I just… get frustrated.’ He went quiet and Kal could make out a quiet feminine voice in the background. ‘I know you have to work and stuff. I just wish you were around more.’
‘I know, bud. I wish I could be around more too. Everything just went to shit after ma died and we, I never, fuck…’
‘I think what Kal means to say is that it would be beneficial for us all to have a sit down and work out a strategy for the future. Something that will help all parties,’ Ben said cheerfully.
‘It doesn’t have to be today,’ Kal cut in, shooting an annoyed look at the man.
‘You’re not… you’re not mad?’ Eli asked quietly.
Kal sighed weakly. ‘Eli, I get it. You’re not a kid anymore. I’m not going to pretend I was thrilled finding you half naked on the couch in the middle of the night with some girl-‘
‘Hayley,’ Eli interrupted.
Kal winced. ‘Hayley. Please tell me you’re using protection…’
‘Kal!’ his brother yelped. Kalevi almost smiled.
‘You know I love you, yeah?’
Eli didn’t hesitate. ‘Yeah, I know. I love you too.’
‘Stay safe. I’ve got to go home and clean the house. Come home when you can.’
‘I will.’ When the phone disconnected, Kalevi had mixed feelings. He glanced at the two shifters standing with him. ‘Thank you.’
Vano nodded. ‘Let’s get you home, little cat.’
The car ride back to Kal’s place was quiet. He knew this wasn’t over, knew they would need to talk about his shifting freeze, but they seemed to have silently decided to leave the conversation for now. He was grateful. He had a lot of his own thoughts to deal with at the moment and some damage control to do with his personal life. Unfortunately, any thoughts he had about tomorrow disappeared in the face of the open front door they found waiting for them. Kal was inside before Ben and Vano could stop him.
‘What the fuck!?’ The place had been trashed. Chairs had been knocked over, the couch cushions ripped from the old couch, and books pulled from the few shelves. The whole place had been torn apart.
Kal ignored Ben’s oath of shock and Vano’s indrawn breath to instead race through the house. There was hardly a single room untouched.
‘I was aware that this was a rough part of town, but this is extreme,’ Ben whispered.
‘This was intentional,’ Vano rumbled.
Ben tore his gaze from the carnage to look at the stag. ‘Intentional?’
Vano nodded. ‘Yes. Look.’
Kal appeared beside them, following Vano’s pointing finger. The three of them stared at the deep claw marks on the kitchen counter. Kalevi was paler than either shifter had ever seen him. In that moment, Ben knew that all their work with Kalevi had gone down the drain. In seconds, Kal’s eyes were already starting to change colour. His expression was equal parts rage and fear.
‘Another shifter has been in my fucking house.’
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END
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